You know what pisses me off? Family. I haven't had much over the years, but god damn. What's left hurts, and it shouldn't be that way. Instead of trying to be there they just give up  on me, and I should try to not generalize everyone but one in particular, my older brother. Step brother, which I don't mind saying at this point. Lately he's been a real dick to me, and its getting to me and I should not let it. Never does he ever compliment or congratulate me on anything I make (I'm an artist here) and when I do anything wrong he jumps at it like flies on a fresh pile of shit and just mocks me about it. Fuck him. He left my life before, granted that he was more or less not allowed to see me anymore, and I was fine, I'll be fine now if I take him out of the picture. I haven't seen him in about a year, and a long time ago I really looked up to him, thought he was the bee's knees and that he was the greatest fucking human being in my life. Now it turns out he is just a festering wart on my ass that just goes out of his way to make my day shit. Fuck him, I don't need him and I don't want him in my life. He doesn't try to communicate with me or if he does he just insults me and brings me down. I don't need that right now, or ever. I would understand constructive criticism, but this isn't the case at all. It sucks. Him and my sister are all I really have left and that is close to me, everyone else is relatively out of the picture and too far to do any good so to speak. Once again, I'm feeling alone and hating it. It doesn't matter where I would have gone or stayed, shit would have hit the fan, but moving to Sacramento has been such an amazing experience, and I've met amazing and wonderful people out here, and I don't need a family to enjoy my life. I'll just be alone, a hermit. Be to myself but love others and if they don't share love back then that is fine, I'm moving on. I don't linger anymore, I learned from doing that and watching others do that. All I can do is move on but god damn. Fuck, this hurts.